Many New Year resolutions will be made, with career goals topping the list. Sadly, very few people see themselves taking the lead in their job-search or in career advancement. Majority will push the responsibility on to the government, employers, friends, parents and other relatives.
Dependency syndrome has to do with personality traits which are defined as the enduring patterns of perceiving, relating to and thinking about one’s environment and oneself that are exhibited in a wide range of social and personal contexts.
It is important to appreciate that as social animals, human beings need each other for survival. However, personal development experts warn that, as individuals grow up, they should smoothly transition from dependency, independency and into inter-dependency. They warn that individuals who wish to succeed in life but have no mind of their own are doomed to fail.
How can you tell whether you are suffering from dependency syndrome? Are you a college graduate who is solely dependent on your parents, guardian or relatives for day-to-day upkeep? Are you afraid of competitively applying and interviewing for jobs or do you believe that you need a ‘big brother’ for you to succeed in your career?
Remain jobless
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Do you normally take responsibility for your life or do you always find yourself blaming your parents, colleagues, weather, economy etc. for the dire situation in your life? Are you risk averse and complacent in mediocrity? Do you believe in begging or borrowing? Do you voluntarily fail interviews, quit jobs or mismanage jobs to an extent of being fired so that you can depend on your spouse, parents and other relatives?
If your answer to any of the above is not in the affirmative, it means that you need an evaluation of your purpose in life and in particular your career life. There are many factors that contribute to the development of dependency. Top on the list is the fear of growing up. Interestingly a lot of people with failed careers harbor the childish wish to be taken care of. They are ingenious with all excuses to ensure they remain jobless or in unproductive activities to ensure that they are economically dependent on others.
Overbearing parents have clipped the minds of their children in the name of protecting them from making career mistakes thereby creating grown-ups who live in their parents’ shadows with no identity of their own.
Low self esteem, laziness among others have been cited as major causes of dependency syndrome.
Dependency can be devastating to both the victim and their caregivers. Most individuals with dependency disorder suffer from apathy. They have no energy or interest in their personal development or others.
The majority also resort to illicit sex, crime, drug and substance abuse to fill the glaring gap in their lives. Lack of attainment in their career goals also give rise to frustrations and resentments that lead to depression and even suicide.
A nation whose youthful population suffers from dependency syndrome disorder is doomed economically and socially. Make a new year resolution to take charge of your career life. Happy 2016!
—The Writer is a Human Resource and Career expert with Peoplelink Consultants Ltd. goretti@peoplelink.co.ke
