Love is a good thing, but your health is vital

When you fall in love with someone, your judgement in most cases becomes skewed. This is because that person takes a central part of your life and you see everything with that person in mind; trying to do everything to please her or him.

When you meet the person at the centre of your affection, sexual desire can overwhelm you and if you have not learnt how to control your emotions, you may find yourself having unprotected sex.

This means many things; diseases, pregnancy and emotional hurt in case that person has other lovers besides you.

And this scenario has become so common among young people that efforts to stem the tide are being sought.

Last week, a Bill was discussed in Parliament that seeks to have a new law to provide reproductive health information to adolescents. It proposes sex education from age ten though parents want it to start after their children turn 14 years old.

However, children aged below 14 have been reported from across the country as having fallen pregnant and dropped out of school. Also, studies indicate that now the age of sex debut is below 14.

Wrong or lack of information misleads adolescents who believe that only through sexual intercourse are they able to express their love. Yet, this is not the case.

“There are many more ways to be intimate with someone apart from sexual intercourse. Kissing, holding hands, hugging, touching and more importantly, talking often, are some ways to be intimate without necessarily having sex,” says Georgina Obonyo, co-ordinator of a youth group based in Nairobi, who deals with youth issues.

“Be sure you only have sex because you want to, not because someone else pressures you or your peers are already sexually active. A healthy relationship is based on mutual respect and equality,” says Obonyo.

When you freely communicate, it is easier to voice your expectations and clearly state when you want privacy. It is good to remember that loving someone is not equal to ‘suffocating’ that person with your presence.

In case you become sexually intimate, ensure you use protection because of the many health risks involved. The best position to take in the relationship is to abstain until marriage but if this is not possible, then look for the many reproductive health options available to protect yourself from diseases.

A condom is the best bet. It protects both of you from sexually transmitted diseases and the girl from unwanted pregnancy.