Failure can be the key to success

Recently, a friend went through some of the most challenging weeks in his life.

He felt overwhelmed, frustrated and pissed off at himself because of some mistakes he had made.

Faced with great opportunities to make some good progress in his life, he had floundered and had all but squandered the opportunities.

Why the sense of failure was so bitter was because the folly was of his own making.

As I spoke to him, he said that that the pain of failure is dulled by familiarity. He clarified that a consistent and reliable friend is better than a friend who only appears on festive days.

Failure can become that friend such that one almost welcomes it. Failure can attract failure because there is no “out” strategy.

While it is interesting to know that after some time failure ceases to wound as much, it is disheartening to realise that some people have settled for this.

Failure is an integral part of success. If you are afraid of failure and do not put yourself in situations where you might fail, then you will unlikely to succeed at anything meaningful.

Of course, this means that sometimes you will fail. You will find yourself in situations where you are flat on your back, bruised and unsure of how you are going to get back up.

How you deal with these situations plays a huge factor in how successful you become.

Everyone has experienced failure at some point or other in his/ her life. And while it is not easy to keep walking when it happens, once you have picked yourself up, past failures can motivate you to improve your life.

Failure, unfortunately, is the unavoidable price of trying to do something. It forces you to look for new ways and be more creative.

FINDING INSPIRATION

However, finding inspiration from failure is often easier said than done.

For anyone trying to get back on their feet after a setback, here are some short term steps to get you back stronger than ever.

Own up to the failure
Perseverance is essential to push one through rough patches, but it can also be your downfall if you refuse to admit failure.

Difficult as it may be, learn to recognise and accept when something is not working. If it is a habit, a relationship or a business and its pursuit is only causing you grief, stop, think and act. An important thing to remember is that, if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

Being able to recognise a failure only means you will be able to re-cast it into something more likely to succeed. Failure teaches you what does not work.

Remember past success

Failing does not make you worthless, or suppose that you will never amount to anything.

Failing just means you strolled up the wrong path, one not meant for you.

Instead of dwelling on where you went wrong, remember all the times when things went right.

Find a way to learn from this mistake, the same way you have learned from other ones.

Take action

Once you have accepted your failure, it is important to make decisions about the way forward, because simply doing nothing will only keep you stagnated where you are. Forget about the past and think about the future.

You cannot change the past so you might as well stop worrying about it.

What would make more sense is to take stock of what you have learned, repackage this, combine it with your knowledge, experience and skills and move on to accomplish your purpose.

If others have got through failure, so can you. Do not let ideals of perfection retard your growth and do not compare yourself to finished success stories.

These success stories are built on many failures that are never spoken about.

Do not expect miracles overnight.

It is difficult to get over a huge setback fast but take a time out to mend and by so doing avoid diving deeper into despair. The human spirit is resilient and you will bounce back again if you allow yourself.

However, it is your choice to make, so choose to come back stronger.

Do not let failing permanently bring you down.

If you are determined and you failed, try again.

A man who fought failure all his life but will always be remembered for his endurance and tenacity is Sir Winston Churchill, who was once quoted as saying, “success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.”

And he lived out that belief despite incredible odds.

The author is a life coach and founder of Peak Performance International, a human potential development firm. coach@peakperformance-int.com