By NIKKO TANUI
By now, even children in my village are aware that Nairobi governor Evans Kidero allegedly smacked the hell out of Nairobi Women Representative, Rachael Shebesh. Before we proceed, let me put it on record that I don’t condone a man slapping a woman for whatsoever reason. Women, however, need to stop that nonsense of thinking they are special and thus, can slap men (like a former First Lady did to a former MP), beat men (like some Nyeri women do to their husbands), or kill men and get away with it. But having said that, I daresay there are women who deserve to be slapped back to their senses.
For instance, if you are a woman who receives child support money from your baby daddy, but instead spend it pampering yourself and your boyfriend, you deserve a slap to bring sense back to your head and spend the money on the intended purpose.
Second, if you drink, smoke and engage in any other risky behaviour while pregnant, you deserve to be slapped back to your senses. If you must smoke and drink, at least wait until you deliver the baby. For Christ’s sake, nine months is not a long time.
Still on pregnancy, if you are a woman who falls pregnant, but waits for up to seven months then try to abort the baby, worse, in a crude way, you deserve a hard slap.
Thirdly, if you are a woman who can’t keep quiet and is always gossiping about your girlfriends, neighbours, workmates, passersby among others, you need to be slapped so that you learn to mind your business.
Fourth, if you don’t feel guilty dating other women’s husbands, my dear Jezebel, you deserve to be slapped into finding your own man.
Fifth, if you have a man who dearly loves and provides for you, but you shamelessly cheat on him with the gardener, boda boda guy, touts and other louts, you deserve to be slapped out of his house.
Lastly, if you are a woman who sees red whenever your man says hello to another woman or receives a call or a text message from another woman, you deserve to be slapped. It might help you realise he doesn’t live in an island. He is bound to know one or two other women, which is not criminal.
