Most children who live in urban areas have little to no space in which to play, so they resort to watching TV or playing on their game consoles. Is there a better way? LYDIA LIMBE finds out

If you were born before the year 2000, chances are that you have fond memories of playing outdoor games with other children in the neighbourhood, from climbing trees, rolling in dry grass or leaves and modelling with clay, to playing cha mama, kati and blada.

Those days, we had lots of space to play in. The tallest buildings in the estates were maisonettes, or three-storey flats in some areas, and they were well-spaced so that children could have their fill of hide-and-seek and racing their tyres.

However, with the increased urbanisation, all open spaces are being taken up by apartment buildings and parking spots. Children have little to no space to play in, so they resort to watching TV or playing on their game consoles.

This leaves them with a lot of pent up energy, which leads to behavioural issues such as hyperactivity, eating disorders, and later drug and alcohol abuse.

“It’s important to stimulate all the five senses; smell, touch, hearing, taste, and sight. Lack of stimulation makes Jack a dull boy,” says Wanjeri Mahihu, a consultant psychologists and founder of Touch of Health, a wellbeing centre.

To prevent these adverse effects of the modern couch potato lifestyle, parents and guardians have to consciously put in an effort in their children’s play, regardless of the impediments of urban living.

“The most crucial part of a child’s growth is seven years and below. It’s at this stage that they soak up everything you feed them, either by listening to you, or by watching you. What they have learnt at this period forms the basis of their adolescent-hood,” adds Wanjeri.

John Onala, a father and play specialist for children with special needs at Grangeville School echoes the importance of both parents playing with their children at all levels. It helps them to know their children’s personality and learning method.

“When parents start playing with their children as early as at the infant stage, they learn their children’s strengths and weaknesses and, most importantly, their interests. This will also inform the other forms of play that need to be included to help develop other skills that do not come naturally,” John says.

It is through play that the left and the right hemisphere of the brain are developed. The left hemisphere deals with logic, while the right hemisphere deals with creativity.

John is quick to point out that as much as it is important to engage in play that develops both hemispheres, it is equally crucial to play games that develop the neural pathways that connect the right and left sides of the brain.

“To do this, one needs to involve games that involve multi-tasking. For example, playing catch with a ball and talking at the same time or driving a toy car while singing,” John advises.

So just how does one engage in play with a child? There are different forms of play that achieve different forms of development.

 

Pretence play

Also known as make belief, this is where the children and the whole family play imaginatively. Examples are ‘house’ (cha mama or cha baba), ‘teacher’ or ‘doctor’ games.

This form of play encourages creative thought, and even special needs children like those with autism can be trained to play such games.

Parallel play

For children who have difficulty socialising with other children, the parent can introduce parallel play, where a child plays independently but alongside other children so as to get used to their presence.

Once the child is comfortable being around others, he or she can be introduced to actually playing with other children while continuing to develop social communication skills.

Solo play

This is encouraged when children are by themselves to enhance creativity. During this kind of play, games that use building blocks or plasticine, for example, allow the creation of anything that comes to mind.

Wanjeri advises that while playing with a child, it is crucial to be firm and loving while correcting them when they exhibit inappropriate behaviour.

“Children have a sense of safety when there’s structured play, or clear boundaries. Therefore, when they make a mistake or behave inappropriately, correct them lovingly and firmly, creating a balance between being a parent, a friend, play-mate and disciplinarian,” she says.

Other than disciplining the child, playing together gives the parent the opportunity to teach family values.

“Remember that by age seven, the child has already soaked up your values, most often by emulating what you do. It’s not enough to tell them what you value as a family; your behavior speaks louder,” Wanjeri points out.

Parents who have one child can deliberately get play mates for their child by inviting nephews and nieces, of even neighbours’ kids over for sleep overs or play dates.

Even if you live in a flat or apartment block, it is still possible to create the same exciting play sessions that were characteristic of the 1990s and previous decades.

“If you have a table tennis set, chess or snakes and ladders, take it out to the parking lot once all the cars have left. Start playing with your children. Soon, the other children and even others will join,” John says, speaking from experience.

Both specialists agree that it’s best to limit the time children spend watching television.

“The closer we are to nature, the close we are to who we truly are. Make a point of going for at least a 20-minute walk with the children every week. Not only do they get fresh air, they get to see and experience different surroundings, which may spark their inquisitive nature or imagination,” says Wanjeri.

Play does not necessarily have to be an expensive affair. Toys can be made at home using materials readily found within the house. Also, if planning to buy toys for the children and at a loss on what to buy, many toy stores have age brackets marked on the shelves, and the attendants can guide you.

“Involve the children when shopping for their toys. Explain in advance the budget allocated, and have them choose what they would like within the financial limits. This will teach them how to make choices and prevent them from throwing tantrums when they do not get what they want,” Wanjeri advises.