Four step guide to becoming a middle class Nairobian

Class is like underwear, it’s necessary and great to have one, but you must not necessarily prove to people that you have it on Photo: Courtesy

Brethren, close your eyes and imagine a lazy woman who has gluttonous children! Now, that is my perception of Nairobi’s so-called middle class folks. These are individuals whose appetite for good things in life is not commensurate with their means. Like bad advice at the local bar, Nairobi is littered with such characters.

In their middle class facade, they spoil their kids with reckless abandon. They spoon-feed and pamper them into spoilt brats by taking them to academies. For the uninitiated, around here, an ‘academy’ is an expensive ‘learning’ institution where spoilt brats are taken for intensive drilling, solely to pass exams. No life skills are taught there. Sports and related curricular activities are highly frowned upon. Little wonder then, that, at an academy, the number of obese children is as low as the number of scandals in Kenya. You notice such brats went to proper academies when they graduate with nothing much, but a fake American accent!