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What is the deal breaker for relationships?

Relationships
 Arguing isn't really a death toll: Photo; Courtesy

 

While arguing is sometimes seen as a red flag, it is not necessarily the worst thing for a relationship. Sometimes it can seem as if it's never been easier to argue as it is these days. Not only are so many of us under increasing pressure on the home, work and financial front, but we're also vulnerable to what's going on around us too.

 And let's not forget, thanks to all the social media platforms at our fingertips, we can vent our spleen and speak up when we come across something we don't agree with - whenever we like.

As for arguing in relationships, a lot is said on this matter. But it's by no means necessarily a 'death toll' for any couple. The four horsemen: So-called because they represent the four factors which cause a regular argument to escalate into something a lot more damaging. They have been identified as criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling.

They can all predict the end of a relationship, but one is worse than the others. Each of these communication styles can be harmful, but contempt is more difficult to move past, and the effects are particularly fatal.

The target of contempt is made to feel despised and worthless. Especially when one-sided, it can become so problematic and the couple in question would really struggle to move past the issue at hand.

Not only is it bad news for the relationships, but it's also bad news for our health. Research proves that couples entrenched in mutual contempt were more susceptible to colds, flu bugs and illnesses.

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