I have been dating a married man for five years, but I can’t leave him due to his skills in bed

I have been sleeping with a man for five years, on and off. He has a girlfriend, yet he still keeps calling and texting me.

I think I’m in love with him. When I do ignore him, he bangs on my door telling me he is worried about me – when I took an overdose he boosted my confidence and told me how attractive I am.

My head is all over the place.

I am now avoiding him but he is messaging my sister and other members of family asking if I’m OK. I just don’t know what to do.

Coleen says

Your only way forward, however much you think you love him, is to keep avoiding him and not to answer his messages.

He hasn’t offered you anything in five years apart from sex and a few kind words to keep you hanging on. If he truly loved you, he’d be with you, but he wants his girlfriend and his bit on the side.

I know that sounds harsh and it’s easier said than done to finish with someone when you’re so attached to them. But it only hurts for a while.

If you keep seeing him, it will hurt for ever because you’ll never get the opportunity to feel better about yourself or to meet someone who thinks you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread and will be faithful to you.

I hope you had support and counselling after the overdose. Nothing and no one is worth ending your life for.